Well I'm not getting a raise.  Apparently that's too much to ask for. 

I've been earning the same pay since October 2006.

Fuck that.

Ok who is Duran Duran and why is their new song Falling Down so great?

I asked for a raise today.  Wei said she would talk to Cindy.  We'll see how well that goes.

Superbowl today - I'm putting my money on the Patriots.  I've been cleaning for two days straight - I'm sick of having guests come over and have to visit our filth that we live in too. 

The feds have been cutting interest rates like crazy lately - it's making me really excited to buy a house, I think we need 2 more months of paying stuffoff and time to get a down payment and reserves then we might be ready... ideally I would like to wait 6 months but I don't know if George would be patient enough for that.

Friday night was an adventure.  We knew two things:  RC Willey's Outlet Store was having a 40% - 70% off sale and our futon was so saggy and broken we couldn't use it anymore.

I didn't take pictures of the broken futon (which would've been funny to see) and I didn't take pictures of the minivan that we rented to take home the new couch (which was also a really, really funny sight with a few pieces of couch pieces strapped to the roof)

But I just took some pictures of how it looks in our home.  I think we're missing an end piece, see how it kind of just ends on the right?  That's ok with us though, because we don't have room for another piece!

It's dark brown leather and light brown suede and SUPER comfy.  I thought the couch-buying process would take about an hour - we'd walk in, find a $200 couch that we absolutely loved and would work for us, then we'd schedule the delivery and pay for it.  Wrong.  Try 2 hours picking out the couch and going $1000 over budget, then spending another hour to get approved for a little bit of credit so you can pay it off next month, then another hour while you find out that there's no delivery, it's will call only, so driving up to the airport where your buddy works to get a minivan for $35 bucks and plow your way back down to RC Willey right at 9 when they close, back up into a loading dock, then wait another hour or two while other customer's items are loaded until you're dead last and trying to fit 5 pieces of a sectional sofa in a Dodge Caravan, finally convincing your husband that it really wasn't all going to fit IN the van, so strapping the last two pieces on the roof, then spending another 30 minutes strapping said pieces down with twine without the help of the RC Willey idiots since they all went home, then another 30 minutes driving across town back home going 15-20 MPH.

That's our redneck way to have a good time.

I don't know how I feel about the look of the new Xanga.  I do know I like having pictures added to the subscription page, so you never have to go to the actual site to read the entry.

Work is a lot better now - I haven't had my job threatened in any way since the talk with Cindy and Wei, in fact I've gotten a lot of help from them with other issues that have come up.  I've decided that I need to stay with AAPC until I've at least worked there a year (which will be around the end of March) and then if things get really bad again I can look seriously for another job.  I have my resume posted on monster.com but I'm not getting much response - mostly I'm getting calls from placement agencies who say something like "I have a client who is looking for an accounts payable clerk, would you be interested?"  No, not really, because I've done clerk work and it's not what I really want to do, and I especially don't want to work with a middle man... every time I ask about the company they never have the answers.  I just want a simple answer like "they've been in business since 1999," or "their benefits package includes medical, dental, 401k, 25 days paid vacation starting after the 90 days probation period..." or "the company sells and manufactures computers" or "they currently have over 1000 employees nationwide."  No, I never get any of that.  It's always "I actually don't know how long they've been in business, but we've been working with them for a few years so I know they're pretty well established, but I can find that out for you...?" (and then I never get an answer, they just tell me that to shut me up) or "their benefits package is, um, like generic... I'm sure they have medical, dental... you know," (no, I don't know.  you're worthless.) or "I don't really know what the company does, I think they do things for medical stuff," (geez that's great, really?!) or "I don't know how many employees they have, I personally have placed about 30 people there this year, so that might give you an idea," (yeah, a GREAT idea of the turnover rate!).
Worthless.

George and I really feel we need to buy a house really, really soon.  The federal reserve just cut interest rates by .75% this week and I think they cut some before that... interest rates are at an all-time low, and the Utah Realtor's Association predicts a 7% drop in house prices in the next 2-6 months.  PERFECT for us. 

So I haven't had my period since August.  My doctor put me on Medroxypr... which from reading crap on the internet, is used to prevent pregnancy, but from what my doctor told me - she said it reboots my system and tells my body "YO!  I know you haven't been working on your own for a couple of years because of birth control, but HEY!  PRODUCE AN EGG, WOULD YA?"  or something.  Anyway, hopefully my period starts soon, then we plan to get prego right away.... which is REALLY scary.  Like, really scary.  I keep thinking about it and how I'm only 21 and I'm not ready and I'm going to be horrible at it but George is getting really old and what if it takes a long time for it to happen because my body is screwy and I think George's body is screwy too... so I best start now so if it takes a couple of years we haven't lost much time.

That's about it I guess.  OH!  Except that I organized my bills yesterday, and it's depressing how horribly exciting that was.  I have everything separated by year then for this year I have it separated by company (Geico, T-Mobile, Comcast, etc) then organized by date it's due (Comcast is due on the 2nd of each month, so that's first.  Gas is due on the 3rd of each month so that's second, etc). 

Ready for the weekend.

Picture by Cari Creighton 2007

I might have a job at $2.50 more per hour.  We'll see how that goes!

I had a job offer from this company: http://www.skiersedge.com/ ... Ridiculous product and ridiculous CEO... he offered me 2k/year less than I'm making now, with the promise of a 2k/year raise after 6 months, and then another 2k/year raise after 6 more months.  I turned it down.  The position is new, all they knew is their accountant has little time to do what she needs to do, so they need someone to help her out.  Bleh.

I'm bored.

A lot has been going on lately, and a whole lot of it not good.

Monday was New Year's Eve and I worked my 8 hours and I drove home, feeling great.  When I was coming up to my house, I looked down at my phone and saw a missed call from work and a voicemail.  The voicemail was from Wei, my boss, and she said something like "Tessa... where'd you go?  You need to call me right now."  I called work but I couldn't remember Wei's extension, so I called Lindsay who has a cubicle right next to Wei, and she picked up and I asked "Lindsay, can you transfer me to Wei?"  It sounded like the phone was being ripped from Lindsay's hands and I heard Wei. 

"Tessa!  Do you like your job?"
"What?"
"Do you like your job??"
"Uh, yes, why?"
"You need to come back RIGHT NOW."
"Why?"
"Why did you leave?"
"...uh... I worked 8 hours?"
"NO!  That is NOT RIGHT!  You have REFUNDS, they have to be DONE!  You come back right now if you like your job!"
"Wei, Cindy told me today that I have until Wednesday to get them done.  Why do I have to come back?  Why are you yelling at me?  I don't appreciate this."
"DO YOU LIKE YOUR JOB!?"
"WEI, YES, I like my job, I don't understand."
"You come back NOW!"
Wei hung up on me.

I was furious.  I didn't know what the hell was going on, I didn't know why Wei was so pissed and why she was threatening my job.  I called back and used the "company directory" to call Wei's extension.  No answer.  I called back and called Cindy, Wei's boss, and got no answer.  I called back again.  No answer.  I called Lindsay's extension, hoping that Lindsay could shine some light on the situation for me.  Cindy picked up.

"Thank for calling AAPC, this is Cindy."
Short pause, confused, why did Cindy pick up?  "Cindy, hi, it's Tessa, is there a problem?"
"Well, yeah, where are you?"
"Uh, I'm at home, what's the problem?"
"Well, Tessa, we're all here working, including your team members, and we ALL want to be home with our families.  We can't go home and just leave when our 8 hours is up if there's work to be done."
"I don't understand.  What did I leave unfinished?  Why are you yelling at me?"
"Tessa, there are refunds that have to be done..."
"And you told me that I had until WEDNESDAY to get them done!  So what is the problem!?"
"Every time you have something to do, you can't procrastinate it until the last minute to get it done, because then problems arise and deadlines aren't met and if deadlines aren't met, then the thought process is 'oh well, we missed a deadline, so what?'"
"Cindy, when have I ever missed a deadline?"
No response.
"WHEN HAVE I EVER MISSED A DEADLINE?"
No response.
"Look, YOU made me manager, YOU OFFERED this position to me and you entrusted me with it.  And as your manager I know my deadlines and I make them.  So as your manager, you need to trust that I will get it done and not call me, threaten my job over the phone, yell at me, and hang up on me!  That is NOT RIGHT, CINDY, AND I DO NOT APPRECIATE IT."
"So you think you're doing everything that a manager should be doing?"
Short pause. "Well I admit I could've asked Wei for permission to see if there was anything that needed to be done, but it's not my fault that something wasn't communicated with me.  YOU TOLD ME refunds had to be done by Wednesday, so if you wanted them done today, you should've told me today!"
"By me telling you that you that the deadline was Wednesday, you shouldn't procrastinate, and you should've had them done today.  Why didn't you do them today?"
"Because it wasn't necessary!  Stevi left for the day and Stephanie didn't even come in, and I wanted their help on them because as you can see there's a huge stack of them that have to be done.  If I did them myself I could've done that, spent all day doing them, but I chose to wait until Wednesday morning when I could utilize my team and get it done in an hour."
"Well if you don't come in and take care of these tonight then we'll just see you on Wednesday and we'll talk about what we should do going forward."
No answer, very long pause.  I didn't have anything else to say.  I still didn't understand why Cindy and Wei were yelling at me, threatening my job, asking something completely unreasonable of me, and at a co-worker's desk?  WHY was it that big of a deal? 
"ALL of us want to be home with our families, and Wei, Lindsay and I can't go home until this is finished.  Lindsay has worked her 8 hours, and she's still here working."
No answer.  Long pause.  Why was she comparing me to someone that wasn't even in the same department?  Lindsay and I don't even begin to do the same tasks.
"So are you going to come in?"
Short pause.  "I'm going to have to think about that."
"Ok, well if you come in, great, otherwise we'll see you on Wednesday and we'll talk about how we'll want to proceed in the future.

I walked inside the house, George was sleeping on the couch.  I told him a brief synopsis of what just happened and sobbed and told him "Well, I think this is it.  I think I'm losing my job."
"Are you going to go in and do the refunds?"
"I don't know!  I don't want to!"
"You should.  You have to.  Just go in and do what they want you to do, then they don't have any beef on you."
"Fine.  Well I guess there goes our New Year.  I'll be there until 8 at least finishing it because I won't have any help."

So I went in.  I called Stevi, my employee, on the way there and, crying, told her the story and she reaffirmed it was bull shit.  Cindy had told Stevi, before she even told me, that refunds had to be done by Wednesday.  Stevi sympathized with me and said that she was coming in to help me finish.

Yesterday Cindy, Wei and I had a meeting and Cindy basically was talking through the whole 30-45 minutes of it.  She started off by apologizing, saying that she and Wei knew that they were in the wrong for doing and saying what they said.  She said if it WAS necessary to have a conversation like that, it should've been in Cindy's office behind closed doors, and having it at Lindsay's desk for all coworkers to hear was completely unprofessional.  She also said that my job should not be threatened every time I turn my back, and if I really am up on the chopping block, that I should be well aware of it and the reasons why.  She said that I was not in danger of being fired.  Wei said that she wouldn't hang up on me again.  I sat there and I nodded, I said things like "Good, because you're right, it's not right" and "Good, thank you."

Needless to say I'm looking for another job.  I'm ok staying at AAPC for a little bit until I find something really worthwhile, but this is not my ideal job, being yelled at by my superiors, and not being respected by my employees (a whole other story).

Anyway...

I just finished reading Harry Potter 7 this morning.  I read for about 4 hours last night, and I was dying to finish the last 3 chapters but by 1 I was having a hard time understanding what I was reading.  I have two questions:

(if you haven't read the book and plan on doing so, don't read on:)

1. I thought Harry was Tonk's and Lupin's son's godfather... what happened there?  In the epilogue Harry had two sons and a daughter, and they mentioned the son but you could tell Harry didn't raise him.


2. I still don't get how Voldemort's curse in the Forbidden Forest didn't kill Harry.  I didn't understand much about what Harry and Dumbledore were talking about at King's Station.. something about how Voldemort took Harry's blood?  But Voldemort was unconscious and came-to at the same time as Harry. 

A fantastic series and book, I want to read more.

I have two words for you:  I rock.

No matter what anyone else says.  I know I rock.